When people talk about what they were like in high school/college, they very generally put themselves into one of two categories- geeks/nerds or popular/cool kids. (Its one of those little culture traits that started from the US)I was never either. I was waayyy too fat and 'introvert' with terribly embrassing parents to be a 'cool' kid but i was also not school smart or uniquely different enough to be classified as a 'nerd'. I was bang in the middle....extremely average, mediocre....wonderfully ordinary. And since high school, thats how i've carried on, so it will probably not come as a suprise when i say i had only one or two very close friends pretty much through my life and everyoneelse just sort of fleeted in and out periodically, whenever it suited and i was pleased for the company.
Now dont get me wrung, i wasnt a loner or anything like that, infact sometimes i loved my own company. I'm the girl who sometimes goes to the cinema on her own to watch a movie she loves(i still do that), or has lunch in the pub with a book as her companion or goes shopping by herself and comes home with nothing... in Wayne W's own words "You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with". I love my company but when i got pregnant and friends were few/scarce, i did worry for awhile that this will affect my unborn child, especially if he ended up an 'only' child. I was scared he would struggle socially, (i mean i didnt really have that problem as a child, as i am one of 6!)
Looking back now, i needn't have worried, as not only have i found him playmates and a 'potential' girlfriend(hard to say as she's blowing a bit hot and cold at the moment) But i think i've finally found my place in the world. I've found friends i can actually talk to and just 'be'myself with, i've found love, support and happiness in places i never even thought possible and for once in my life, i dont really have to rely on my inner strength to get me through things......
Counting all my blessings just now, i feel sooo in love with Jesus right now........or is it just gratitude???
awwwww im so glad you feel so blessed. I did not fit in at school either, being a hippy goofy girl, but feel really blessed with friends now too xxxx
ReplyDeletePlus i think you are absolutely stunning and radiant and thought that when i first met you, with such a sense of style. I would love to get to know you more though i dont drive but come and hang out with me and the boys in the hols sometime, they love babies! x
thanks so much ali! the post wasnt meant to sound sad! its supposed to be up beat and happy! would love to meet your boys and conor would be happy for more male exposure in his life! apart from his dad, his constantly surrounded by women lol xxx
ReplyDeletelet me know when ur free and we can arrange something x